


Doesn't Matter

by Jess4400



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Character Study, Domestic Violence, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Oneshot, self-deprecating thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-12 12:54:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19946503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jess4400/pseuds/Jess4400
Summary: Max can't afford to care.





	Doesn't Matter

Max grits his teeth as he packs his bag.

The dim light in his room flickers on and off, almost in time with his pounding heartbeat.

Max isn’t stupid. He knows that normal parents aren’t supposed to spend rent money on drugs. He knows that getting evicted from a shitty, cockroach-infested apartment for the third time isn’t a common experience. He knows that a mother and child shouldn't wear twin bruises on their arms, mottled and ugly, like some kind of fucked-up matching tattoo.

He snatches a few crumpled shirts out of his laundry basket. Adds them to the bag.

His door is open. Broken hinges prevent it from closing. Distant yells reverberate in his ears as his mom and dad fight in the living room. He does nothing. He knows from experience that things get uglier and drag on longer when he intervenes. He’s numb to the sound of insults in another language he wishes he didn’t understand. Maybe then he wouldn’t know the reason why his mother’s eyes water when his dad tells her he hates her.

It doesn’t matter.

He says this, yet his body is in overdrive, anger surging through his veins like electricity. Added to the mix is panic over the _what-if’s_ and the _what-comes-next’s._ He knows he needs to pull himself together. One whiff of emotion from him and his dad will use it as an excuse to blow off more steam.

Max is being dramatic. It doesn’t matter, okay? Really, it doesn’t. He needs to tell himself this, because, in the end, he can’t afford to care. He can’t be angry. He can’t be anxious. He can’t be scared. He’s not _allowed._

Something shatters in the living room.

He startles.

Oh well. One less thing for them to carry.

His mom shuffles into his room sometime later, cradling her arm to her chest. Max always thinks of her as a baby bird. She’s fragile and tiny; her wings are clipped and her body burrows into the darkness of a nest she’s outgrown. She hugs him and sobs, ugly sounds coming from her lips as tears soak his already-stained shirt. He rubs soothing circles into the back of her sari and formulates a plan. He explains the steps they need to take in a low voice, making sure his dad can’t hear. It’s not like they’re running away without him. The man just needs to calm down first.

Max helps his mom pack her suitcase. She’s still crying, but there’s not much more he can do. He gives her another hug, extracting as much comfort from it for himself that he can muster. He shouldn’t be so selfish (his mom is the one who should be upset, not him, never him), but his energy is fizzling out. He’s reached the end of his wick. Now all that’s left of him is a soupy mess of hot wax that clings to anything cold that touches him.

His mom takes it upon herself to make some phone calls. Some of the tension in Max’s shoulders dissipates as he hands off the metaphorical responsibility baton. He hears her voice as it comes in and out of earshot, syncing with her pacing outside his door. His dad blares the T.V. in the other room, causing his mom to strain her choked-up voice to make herself heard.

Max finally collapses in his bed and hugs Mr. Honeynuts close. Some tears escape his eyes and dampen the fur, but it’s okay. He’ll have his short little cry like a pussy, and everything will be better in the morning.

And if it’s not, it doesn’t really matter, does it?

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a while back but never posted it because I wasn't 100% happy with it. I'm going to take the plunge and post it anyway since I think it has a couple of redeeming lines, haha. Let me know what you think!


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